I used to wonder what the heck fear of success meant.  I mean, we all strive for success at whatever it is we are doing.  We want to be promoted, recognized, admired, acknowledged for our contribution…don’t we?  We say we do but I’ve discovered that when faced with the reality of success, some of us (myself included) get a little scared.  Will I be able to maintain this level of quality?  Will I be more visible and therefore my mistakes more easily noticed?  Will I have to work more hours?  Can I live up to my new found reputation?  Will my relationships change? Do I want to do what it takes to sustain my success?  What if people find out that I’m really not that good?  What if it doesn’t work out the way I had hoped it would?

Of course, in order to avoid dealing with these fears, we unconsciously sabotage ourselves.   Then we feel frustrated and demoralized because we’re not as successful as we (say) we’d like to be.  We get caught in a vicious cycle.

So, how do we get out of it?  First we need to identify what we are afraid might happen if we achieve the success we seek.  Then, we need to investigate and test the assumptions that make us believe these things might happen.  Is it true I’ll have to work longer and harder?  Is it true that I’m not as good as people think I am?  Why do they think I’m good when I’m no so sure?  Will my relationships change and if so, is that all right with me?  What new relationships might be created out of my success?  And so on. 

Our assumptions and the fears they create, more than our lack of skills and knowledge, are what keep us from acting on our stated intentions.   Only by bringing them out into the light can we wrestle them to their rightful size and step over them.