Yesterday, I wrote a post about my struggle to write a blog post despite the fact that I knew I should do it.  After I wrote it, I realized that my resistance to writing was about ’shoulding’.  I asked myself, ‘Who says I should?’ ’Do I think I should?’  ‘Why should I?’  And I came up with the fact that I’ve been told by blogging experts that I should, because I need to have a regular presence in the blogosphere.  I think I should because, well, THEY say so and I have this voice in my head that says, ‘If I were really serious about building my business and serving my clients, then I would write regularly.’ I realized that as long as those were the reasons why I should, I wouldn’t.  But, when I realized what I can gain by doing it, what’s in it for me, I got excited.  The benefit, for me is that, I really like to write and I’d like to get better at it and that once I get started I get on a roll and I have fun writing.  I think that people can relate to my writing and that what I have to say is useful to a lot of people.   So there are a lot of really good reasons to write often.  But, as long as certain conditions are in place (in my mind) it’s a stuggle.

Here are the top 6 things that get in my way and what I can do to overcome them:

 Problem:  I’m highly self-critical and often think my writing isn’t good enough. 

Solution:  Acknowledge my inner critic and invite her to  take a back seat for a while and come back later.  Continue writing until I am finished and then go back and edit.  Remember that my first attempt is only a draft, a starting point to work from, not the final product.

Problem:  I think I should.

Solution:  Determine what the value is for me; how will I benefit? 

Problem:  I don’t know how to get started.

Solution:  Just start.  Look inside at what’s going on, listen to your inner voice or look at an article or website and just start writing about what you find.  Usually, once I get started, it just starts to spill out of me.

Problem:  Self-defeating beliefs

Solution:  Test those beliefs.  Are they true?  Is it true that I have to post every day in order to be good and committed?  No.  I’m  good at what I do and committed to my clients and my business whether I post every day or not.

Problem:  Perfectionism

Solution:  “Perfect is the enemy of progress.”  Determine when good is good enough.

Problem:  I don’t have time.

Solution:  I’ll do what I can in the time I have.  If I don’t finish, I’ll come back to it later.  Often, things don’t take as long as I think they will and I find that the time I have available is, in fact, enough time.

HO! HO! HO!  I actually love the holidays.  But, getting beyond the layers and layers of stress can be something of an excavation project.  Once done, I can feel my heart swell with love and excitement and celebration!  I want quicker access to that.  Why do I feel stressed?    All of the ’shoulds’ and ‘musts’ and expectations set by Hallmark and the like!  Families hugging in front of the blazing fire, with soft white snow falling beyond the window, Christmas carols playing the background and the sweet smell of home baked cookies wafting through the air.  Christmas morning, Mom gets out of bed looking great, make-up in place, perfect nightwear on her perfect body.  The house looks like Martha Stewart stopped by for a quick consult!  Please!!!  It’s enough to make anyone feel inadequate!  So here’s how I get great joy during the holidays:

1. Enjoy the present moment.  Love what you you are doing RIGHT NOW, without regard to what else you have to do.  What you are doing at this very moment is the perfect thing!  My husband and I went on our annual Christmas shopping date.  He hates ot shop and I hate shopping with him.  But, we had a ball because we were together, without a timetable, looking for special gifts for the special people in our lives. 
2. Appreciate what you have.  There are so many others who have less.  Just 50 miles west of here, right now, folks are spending their 12th consecutive day without power due to storms.  And even they are fortunate compared to others who don’t even have homes to light and heat.
3. Listen to your favorite Christmas music as you wrap presents.  Sing along.  Who will know and if they do, who cares?  Do what you want! 
4. Create memorable moments and traditions.  When my kids were really little, I  created a treasure hunt for them to follow to find one of their presents on Christmas morning.  It’s become a tradition.  Now, at 12 and 15, they still ask if we’re going to have a treasure hunt.  It’s a joy to create and the whole family loves watching them run around to find the prize.
5. Pamper yourself.  Take a nap when you’re tired. Ask for help.  Do things together.  Cut out unnecessary, burdensome tasks.  They can wait. 
6. DO AT LEAST ONE THING EVERY DAY THAT CREATES JOY FOR YOU!

Yesterday, I got an email thanking me for sending a bracelet to a woman who had ordered it for her mother for Christmas.  The purchaser shared with me a story about how her mother, after losing her son (the buyer’s brother) to suicide many years ago,  had served so many others who had suffered similar losses.  The bracelet (one designed especially for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention)  was the buyers way of saying thank you to her mother for all she had done and to give her the strength to keep on going.  She thanked me for creating such a meaningful gift.  It just doesn’t get any better than that!  The circle of giving…offering something so meaningful and special, given in appreciation of someone who has done so much for others.  Whew.  That’s powerful.  Thank you, Becky, for sharing your story.

I love hearing how people are using New Leaf Touchstone products.  I welcome you to let us know by posting your comments on this blog!  Your stories will help motivate and inspire others.  Together, we’ll create a powerful circle of service!

Your mood is all a state of mind.  As Henry Ford said, Whether you think you can or you think you can’t you’re right.  So, as I sit here in a bit of a funk, looking out at yet another gray, dreary day, I could just declare it a bad day and it will be.  That thought will have me dive back into bed, pull the covers over my head and do nothing.  But instead, I’m going to set my intention to have a great day, to find the greatness in all of the things around me, to be grateful for what I have and all of the wonderful people in my life and trust that all good things will come.  I’m beginning to feel better already.  Each time I notice my outlook slip a bit, I’ll redeclare my intention to have a great day, do something that restores my faith and move onward.  Oh, the mind is, indeed such a powerful force.

Yikes.  I’m just amazed at how much of life I do on auto-pilot!  Today, I noticed that the way I put on my seatbelt is a habit.  I know that sounds weird but I have a bad habit of getting in the car, starting the engine, putting it in reverse to back out of the garage and WHILE I’M backing up, I buckle my seatbelt!  I do the same thing backing out of a parking space.  How dangerous is that?  I’m going to be more conscious of this and try to do it differently.  It may not sound like a big deal but, I’ve got a teenager and I need to be really conscious of the example I set for him!  What are some of your quirky habits?  Won’t you share them with me?